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2014 Update: Drink hard, heavily, and often when having to spend time with a man who expects you to keep your dignity all evening.

Source: kitschyliving
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stand-up-comic-gifs:

'Cause they had the monopoly so they could say that. - Patton Oswalt (x)

I dyed eggs today and my dad bought non-PAAS and I was mortified.

Source: stand-up-comic-gifs
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Jesus Christ Superstar - Superstar

"I only wanna know."

These are some of the ballsiest lyrics ever written.

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We all kept giggling at the pooping boy figurine.

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natalieroses:

Lucille Ball in Technicolor,1946

Source: natalieroses
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Then he’s not your goddamned soulmate