2014 Update: Drink hard, heavily, and often when having to spend time with a man who expects you to keep your dignity all evening.
'Cause they had the monopoly so they could say that. - Patton Oswalt (x)
I dyed eggs today and my dad bought non-PAAS and I was mortified.
"I only wanna know."
These are some of the ballsiest lyrics ever written.
We all kept giggling at the pooping boy figurine.
The DirecTV one, guys.
Lucille Ball in Technicolor,1946
Then he’s not your goddamned soulmate